Do you think about shopping more than you think about sex? If you are a woman, chances are the answer is YES.
They say men think about sex about every 52 seconds while women think about sex once a day. Turn the tables from sex to shopping, and we women are supposedly thinking about that hot new dress or that enviable new purse every 60 seconds. Putting it in those terms, it’s no wonder “Sex and the City’s” Carrie Bradshaw was exclaiming “Hello Lover!” to that amazing pair of Louboutins in the department store window!
How is it then that men can think about sex every 52 seconds and it is “normal”, but a woman’s thinking about shopping at the same level could indicate “widespread addiction”? I happen to take major issue with that!
I don’t know about you, but I’m constantly thinking about shopping. Every time I drive by a mall, Target or even TJMaxx, I can’t help but think about what I might be missing. I am always wishing I had a few extra minutes (or lately a few extra bucks) to stop in and see if there is something I just can’t live without. Each night I drop the kids off for sports, I’m thinking, “How much time do I have; can I squeeze in a quick trip to this store or that?” In my mind, there is never enough time to shop and definitely never enough money!
Given my shopping habit, I am in a constant state of buying and returning. As my friends know, I have little self control when I’m out shopping. Unless it’s super expensive, I have to bring it home and then make the real decision as to whether or not to keep it or take it back. I don’t know why, but I have to see it in my closet and try it on at home to make a real decision about it. Then of course, if it’s something for the kids, who knows if it will fit or most of all, if they’ll like it (this drives me CRAZY!) So, it’s no big surprise that at any point in time I usually have no less than $100 in merchandise, either for me or one of my three kids, in the trunk of my SUV en route back to the store. Of course, like Erma Bombeck once said “The odds of going to the store for a loaf of bread and coming out with only a loaf of bread are three billion to one.” Need I say more???
I have a walk-in closet that I adore. I treat it like a museum holding all of my precious collection. I love organizing it and assembling my items by style and color. To have a closet like Mariah Carey’s would be like a dream come true to me. As one of my friends who loves shopping as much as me puts it – some people have hobbies they spend a lot of money on – my hobby is shopping. I have to admit, it upsets me that I can’t remember my children’s first words or that adorable thing they did that was so cute – but I can pull any article of clothing out of my closet and tell you what store I bought it in, who I was with and how much it cost. That is a sickness, and I am not proud of it!
Whenever I’m out and about, I am always checking out what other women are wearing, I mean, don’t we all? I hate it that I can usually identify at least one piece of clothing a woman has on and where it came from- assuming the woman has a sense of style, that is. In fact, during a recent trip through O’Hare, full family in tow, we were standing in the security line when I enviously pointed out a woman in front of us to my husband. “Look”, I said, “She’s wearing those expensive Louboutin’s! See the red sole? Oh, and look at her cute True Religion jeans, and that Louis Viutton bag!” Of course, I was in my all comfort, no style “mom” jogging suit and running shoes that I had to wear because they wouldn’t fit in my suitcase. It just kills me when I’m looking so frumpy and there’s some other woman looking all stylish!
I love the pleasure that comes with anticipating and putting together the perfect outfit, and I think I am pretty good at it. In fact, one of my friends playfully says she always thinks WWRB whenever she is out shopping – What Would Renita Buy?
I always find it interesting to see how people prioritize their spending. For example, I have had my pots and pans since we got married; they are 15 years old. I really need to replace them. Somehow, I don’t have the money for that, but if I found the most perfect fitting pair of jeans that made my stomach look flat and my butt perfectly round, I’d have to purchase them on the spot without (much) regard to the price – kind of like how Carrie in “Sex and the City” said “I’ve spent $40,000 on shoes and I have no place to live.” Ok, like Carrie, but not that bad!
As you can see, I could go on and on about shopping, but I really need to wrap this up because I have to work-out then return the two blouses I got at Nordstom and exchange them for the cute dress they’re holding for me at Caché and I only have two hours to drive 50 minutes each way to Woodfield Mall to exchange the shirts and pick up the dress before I have to be at school to volunteer at 2:15!
Ok, let me preface this by saying this is NOT my shopping loot, but did it make for a great story… On my last girlfriend’s trip, we were at that fabulous Vineland Premium Outlet in Orlando when my friends called me over and pointed out this OBSCENE cart filled with tons of bags. They thought it would be great fun to take a picture and text it to my husband and tell him what a “great day” I had out shopping. (By the way, he’s painfully aware of my intense LOVE for shopping.) So I’m in the middle of taking the picture – and mind you, every person walking by is pointing and staring at the squanderous (that’s not a word, but it fits so well, I couldn’t help but use it) number of bags on this cart – when a very visibly upset woman gets all in my face and asks “And WHY are you taking a picture of my shopping cart?”Getting a little nervous, but knowing my friends are close by and will protect me, I say in my dumb blonde voice “Well, I have a blog called “My Life While Shopping” and I thought this would make an awesome picture for it.” She then tells me in a very stern voice to delete the picture to which I said, “Oh, can I keep it and just send it to my husband? He’ll think it’s funny.” She said, “NO, I want you to delete it!” Sensing she wasn’t very bright and feeling more gutsy than usual, I pretended to delete the pictures and walked away. We stood by watching as she and her posy grabbed the cart and scooted away as fast as they could. They were definitely up to no good. What kind, I can only guess. Anyway, I did get a good laugh when I texted the picture to my husband. His reply to my awesome day of shopping was: “Great, now you can use your push cart to make all the returns!” I WISH!
Until next time – remember, there’s only one shopping day left until tomorrow!!!